9th January, a bucket of hope

It's semester break, people! I'm finally homeeeeeee~

Oleh sebab aku dilahirkan agak awal dari kawan-kawan aku, maka ucapan sebegini memang dah sebati;
"Selamat Hari Tua!"
"Happy Birthday. Dah tua hokaaay hahaha"

Tapi paling obvious sekali adalah,

"Semoga dipertemukan jodoh bla bla bla"


How time flies. I'm all grown up now, still have a long wayyyyy to go.
So for past 20 years, what I have really done with myself actually?

 I, myself don't know though haha. Because I'm all go with the flow kind of person.

Okay, this is happened on a day before my birthday. Just because I have to sit my exam on my birthday, so these cool girls aka my roommates and jiran sebelah decided to make a surprise birthday party for me. I didn't realize their 'acting' even though I sensed something was not right on that moment but I just let it slide.

Dengar ada orang ketuk bilik panggil Yana, pastu aku suruh je orang tu masuk sebab malas buka pintu. Disebabkan dekat bilik takde orang, maka aku pun buka la pintu. Sekali hambikkkk

I was speechless on that time!!

Thank you girls for the treat especially Yana. KFC treat and a yummy-licious rainbow cake, alhamdulillah.

My life is not that amazing like you do, but I'm more than grateful. I'm not from a rich family, I rarely wear branded items and wear fancy accessories, I don't have a car for myself like some of my friends really do.

If I had a chance to make a flow chart diagram of my life, you would see my journey in different kind of angles.
It's not the same Fizah like I used to be back then. People changed, right?

Why I have to be grateful?

I can make it to this stage. All of us have experienced challenges in our life, but what matters the most is how we can deal and try to fit in with such situations.
At times when it takes me to rough patches, it's very painful. I can't even tell how bad is that.
But I try to be optimist because it's the mind that can heal your body perfectly.
I slowly walk away,  I just set my mind that how difficult things can get, I'll get through them as there's always a way.

And it will always be.

I have a very lovely and supporting family- Ayah, ibu and Hafiz. I have my best friends which I can tell a very single detail about them. I have my friends which we have been witnessed the ups and down each of us, be fooling around like hell and the only people that we can be truly ourselves at most of the time. And the rest of my high school friends which happen to be my BFF and still able to keep in touch with them. If you read this, you know who you are. *wink*

However, I'm all aware to myself that I will never look back.
I've been holding back for quite some time, and it's time to let it go.
To vast my dream and hopes, trying not to lose myself.
I want to appreciate more people around me.
I want to appreciate time.
I want to be better in person.
Instead of bragging the past, I am happy for what I am doing now. 
I don't want my life get wasted for certain time when I was really down.
I finally found my inner strength to face anything.

What is it?
Just back to basic. Walau jatuh macam mana sekali pun.

May the year become more better for the last. I believe in miracles, I will accept what have been destined to me, In shaa Allah.

p/s : Thank you for all your wishes and dua's


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